Nesting bird
Photo via depositphotos
I have a regular route for my morning run. It goes by a large tree that is home to an osprey pair. Osprey generally mate for life and return to the same nest each year. The female incubates the eggs while the male defends the nest.
For about five years, as I approached on my run, the male would start screeching, then would fly away, to distract my attention from the nest. Then things changed.
The male ignored me. I estimate that he’d seen me run by 500 times or more. I couldn't ask him, but I think he would tell me that he trusted me. He no longer considered me a threat because my behavior had shown him otherwise.
This is how trust develops.
It takes time and it takes action. As a leader, this is one of your most important tasks.
I’ll summarize my blog post, Four Ways to Build Trust:
- Extend trust (be vulnerable)
- Find common ground through origin stories
- Be trustworthy
- Put the mission first
My point is that these things take time. As with the osprey, those you lead won’t automatically trust you just because you’re the leader. They may have to listen to you, but they don’t have to trust you. It takes consistent action over time.
In his book, First Things First, Stephen Covey shares the concept of the law of the farm. This is the idea that important things are often not urgent, and they take time. Unlike a student who doesn’t study all semester, then crams for the final, a farmer can’t cram the production of a crop the night before a harvest. The law of the farm.
Covey points out that many things that are important but not urgent follow this law. These include cultivating relationships, improving your health, developing proficiency/expertise and building trust. If you want to see results, put in the time.
More than ever, effective leadership requires trust. Non-anxious leaders don't rush it. They realize that they either have the trust of the people they lead, or they need to continue to cultivate it. Either way, they understand that trust takes time.