Disciples Called
Special to United Methodist Insight
If this were a normal year, we would be looking forward to the election of bishops in July.
Since we won’t be electing bishops at that time, it might be fun to compare the United Methodist election system with the selection system employed by Jesus.
The alarming thing about Jesus is that he had no management training. His sloppy administrative style is most evident in his recruitment practices. He apparently had no guidelines for selecting disciples. In fact, he seems to have chosen them at random.
Had Jesus employed United Methodist strategies he would not have made that mistake.
All the synagogues would have been invited to send one Pharisee and one layperson to participate in the election process. There would be some complaints that scribes and Sadducees should not be considered as laypersons.
The presiding officer would have read selections from the Torah and the minutes from the last meeting of the Sanhedrin to ensure that elections would be held in keeping with Mosaic principles.
An occasionally working electronic system would have been used.
Simon Peter would have run well in early ballots, but he would have been rejected for being too impulsive and quick-tempered. Other candidates would also fail to receive the necessary votes: James and John––too argumentative; Thomas––too cynical; Zacchaeus––too short to be seen by the chairperson; Simon––too revolutionary; and Phillip––too impatient.
Mary Magdalene would lose votes because of an undeserved reputation. Caiaphas would have done well, but a rural caucus would have put their votes together to try to elect a lesser-known Pharisee.
Matthew would have come close, but some would accuse him of receiving votes in exchange for lower tax bills.
Martha would have done well until she left to fix dinner.
Judas, the only disciple trusted to carry the money bag, would have been near the top of most ballots.
After 20 ballots and no elections, the group would have stopped to consider the use of Rule 27 (final adjournment). That’s when some noticed Jesus was missing.
A few thought he’d gone on another recruiting trip. Others decided he’d gone for a walk on the water.
But, in fact, he had returned to the wilderness to ask the tempter if control over all the kingdoms on earth included the United Methodists.
The Rev. Rich Peck of Nashville, Tenn., is a retired clergy member of the New York Annual Conference. A veteran communicator, he currently writes for the United Methodist General Commission on Men.