The One Thing You Give Up to Join the Wesleyan Covenant Association

by

Join the best of the best

Friday, October 7th, is the big day: the launch of the Wesleyan Covenant Associationand the big meeting in Chicago. 1700 people are advertised to attend.

The biggest stages are given to those with the most evangelist success, and many of the youngest members of the Convener team. There are even more women speaking in one day than in many other evangelical conferences include over a week’s time.

These are the success stories of people that have endured despite the institution being set against them. And if you join them, if you join the Wesleyan Covenant Association, then not only you can be inspired by these speakers to reach more people for Jesus Christ, you can learn how to break free from a broken institution. 

…There’s just one thing.

There’s one catch, though. You have to give up one tiny belief.

You see, the Wesleyan Covenant Association does not support full inclusion of LGBTQ persons in the Church. 

And by signing up, you acknowledge that you don’t support allowing LGBTQ persons to get married or to serve as pastors without first divorcing their same-gender spouse.

Surely it’s worth it to give that up? Look at all you get by signing on the line and giving that up. Let me convince you. 

But Wait! There’s More!

The WCA proposal is quite simple: join us.

  • Join us and you’ll be nose-to-glass with the best evangelists within United Methodism.
  • You’ll get elbow-to-elbow with authors and professors who now channel their writings through Seedbed and New Room, not Cokesbury and Abingdon.
  • And you’ll get temple-to-temple hushed conversations with fellow like-minded folks to better “get what is yours” from United Methodist resources in your area.

You get all of these things, including the resources and energy that the participants’ congregations, institutions, and individuals have divested from The United Methodist Church for decades. All this pent-up talent and inspiration is yours for the taking.

You get all of this for a small membership fee, less than Netflix for a year.

And all you have to give up is your belief that LGBTQ people should be given all privileges of straight people and included at all levels of the Church.

Such an easy choice, right?

Predictions

It’s easy to predict what will be said. The speakers will speak of their personal success, and of others in the movement. They will speak with disdain and provide examples of institutional malaise, and they will put John Wesley’s warning about his “biggest fear about Methodists” on repeat. The word “homosexual” will not be mentioned. 

And at the end, the sign up sheet will be passed around, saying you get all of these things and can be part of this revival that will save all the things you hold dear and revive the spirit of the church again after it throws off its institutional husk like a cicada.

And all you have to give up is your belief and advocacy that LGBTQ persons are to be fully included in the life of the Church.

That’s it. 

Just give up that tiny thing, and you too can be successful, and…look at all the friends you’ll instantly make who are better supported by the church and society, and don’t have so many weird pronouns to learn.

Ready to Sign on the Line?

It’s a very simple proposal, the one the Wesleyan Covenant Association has given. All you have to give up is advocating for your neighbor, family member, friend, or fellow church member to be fully included in the life of the Church.

That’s all.

Go ahead and sign on the line, and leave them behind, so you can save more people to Jesus Christ. 

Surely the legions of converts are more important than that one person in your life who probably doesn’t like the church anyway. 

It’s time to triage, man, and let them go so you can get on with saving souls to Jesus Christ.

That’s an easy choice, isn’t it?

Braveheart was a Fool

In the final scenes of Mel Gibson’s 1995 epic movie Braveheart, Scottish freedom fighter William Wallace has been captured by the British and is being tortured in front of a crowd. The torturer states several times that all Wallace has to do is one thing: pledge loyalty to the British king, and Wallace will be executed without the torture. Wallace refuses, and the torture gets worse and worse. 

Finally, at the very end, the torturer gestures the crowd into silence, expecting Wallace to beg for mercy. Wallace instead lifts his head and roars “FREEDOM!” as his last word. His spirit unbroken, the torturer finally executes him, having lost the battle of wills.

Wallace was a fool.

Wallace could have ended the pain. All he had to do was give up that one thing. Just one thing, and the pain would go away, and the taste of the eternal was there for him.

The Wesley Covenant Association is telling gay-affirming evangelicals and moderates to give up that one thing. The pain of institutional malaise and downward trends will be gone, and life in the new revival will be yours.

All you have to do is sign on the dotted line, and give up that one thing, pledge adherence to a fixed slate of leadership, and all this will be yours.

Aren’t you ready to stop being a “moderate” or a weird “gay-affirming evangelical” and join the majority again? Give up that one conviction, and the pain of being marginalized will be over. 

Your Turn

So what’s your choice?

  • Are you with Jesus? Then join the Wesleyan Covenant Association.
  • Or are you still standing with the marginalized, the modern-day orphans, widows, immigrants, and outcasts? Are you still standing with people who are part of the kingdom of God, but we really just aren’t ready for yet? Sigh. Then go back to your broken, inept institution, that was built over generations, and whose money and property was given to the WCA to abscond with. Good luck. 

The choice is yours.

—

The above is both true to the facts and satirical in presentation in order to name that the WCA is built on the exclusion of LGBTQ people and no amount of enthusiastic preaching of “Jesus, Jesus, Jesus” can hide that reality.