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Young disciples
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Aug. 29, 2023
My parents are fond of saying that us five kids came out of the womb with our personalities intact. The same may be true of the children and youth in your congregation. When discipling young people, it is essential to understand their personalities to reach them most effectively. I like using the DiSC® model of behavior to assess personality styles. Although personalities are technically not set until later in life, you can learn a lot about a child by observing their actions and behavior now.
For example, children whose personality reflects the Dominance (D) style are often seen as brave, confident, and assertive. A child with the Influence style (i) is outgoing, enthusiastic, and talkative. Both (D) and (i) styles are fast paced. Children with the style of Steadiness (S) are even-tempered and empathetic, while children with a Conscientiousness (C) style like to take their time and be organized. (S) and (C) styles are moderately paced. And, of course, all children, like adults, reflect each of the four styles within their personalities to differing degrees.
By understanding the different DiSC® styles of the children of your congregation, you can create an environment where children feel comfortable, engaged, and able to relate to the message being taught. You can help by providing opportunities for them to learn and interact in ways as diverse as their personalities.
For instance, let’s say you have a group of children that primarily are Influence (I) style. Connect the group by organizing a fun and interactive activity that allows them to express themselves creatively. Children with the (S) style may appreciate a calm and nurturing environment for engaging in group play. Children with the (D) style can be given a problem that requires risk or boldness to solve. Children with the (C) style can design processes for caring or incorporating new children into the group.
Creating an engaging and inclusive environment for children in church is essential for their spiritual growth. As adults and leaders, we must ensure children feel safe and respected in their faith community. After all, Jesus too exhibited varying personality styles, and we see it in the Gospels. We know of his compassion, forgiveness, and empathy, but we know he also took risks, questioned, challenged, inspired, and shook things up.
By creating an environment where children can feel comfortable exploring their faith and expressing themselves, this helps them be more Christlike. Invite them into conversations and provide activities tailored to their preference.
Regardless of DiSC style, here are 6 things you can do to create a safe and empowering environment for children:
- Encourage children to ask questions freely
- Model kindness, understanding, and respect
- Invite the children to be honest and take risks in sharing their perspectives
- Make sure everyone is included and feels heard across the DiSC® styles
- Facilitate conversations that are meaningful for the child’s age and development level
- Shake things up!
Understanding the DiSC® model of human behavior and applying this knowledge to create an inclusive and engaging environment for children in church is not just a matter of intellectual understanding. It is, in fact, a call to practical wisdom – to understand and act upon these learnings. It’s about stepping out of the realm of theory into the realistic, dynamic world of action.
In my three-year award-winning leadership coaching program, Creating a Culture of Renewal®, church leaders are equipped with a variety of DiSC® profiles to facilitate the growth of healthy and vibrant church communities. Communities that empower both adults and children. Reach out to learn more.
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