Sin Block
Photo Courtesy of Emily Carroll
If you missed parts 1 or 2 of this series, please start here.
All this took place to fulfill what had been spoken by the Lord through the prophet:
“Look, the virgin shall conceive and bear a son, and they shall name him Emmanuel, which means “God is with us.” – Matthew 1:22-23
Then Mary said, “Here am I, the servant of the Lord, let it be with me according to your word.” – Luke 1:38
I don’t want to write this one. Putting the words on the page for some reason seems like a transgression in line with the one I’m about to propose happened. Is that because by talking about it we realize our own susceptibility to it? Like if I pretend these things don’t happen, then maybe it’ll never happen to me? But of course, the fastest way to sinning is pretending you are above it. The fact that this blog seems harder to write than my last one tells you something about our expectations of men and women. It doesn’t surprise us to hear that a man raped a woman (even though it should). But what if Mary chose adultery?
That’s right. What if our pure, innocent, small, virgin Mary was not so virgin at all, but rather more experienced than we care to admit? What if Mary chose sexual engagement with a man (other than Joseph), and her growing belly is indeed proof of her imprudence? What if her claim to virginity is a cover for her more nefarious actions of the night?
Though this thought might make your head whirl, it’s one that says something powerful about our God. Mary’s Magnificant all the sudden seems more personal, what with God “looking with favor on the lowliness of his servant.” What if she deserved that lowliness, and still, “The Mighty One did great things for [her]?” God’s mercy takes on new meaning when it’s clear that she really, really, REALLY didn’t deserve to carry the Christ-child; the totality of God’s forgiveness more evident when Jesus is born, not without sin, but despite it.
Because that’s the beauty of Christmas, isn’t it? That God would know us, that God would embrace that which makes us human and in doing so give us access to the sacred. That God would take on human flesh, not so we can be perfect, but so we can be us. That the heartbeat of God would thump-thump, thump-thump inside a woman who cheated on her fiancé, so she would know that even her biggest sins are not too big for God’s redeeming love. The beating of the heart and the kicks of Jesus’ feet reminders that sin cannot stop love... that still love grows, more powerful and more beautiful than you ever thought possible.
Maybe the scandal of Christmas is that God can redeem even the gossip that is deserved. By naming our susceptibility to sin, we also name our capacity to be redeemed. That all of us can find ourselves within Mary’s story, not a story that’s perfect, but a story that’s real. That all of us carry sin so great we don’t think it can be uttered, and that God comes defiantly and confidently proclaiming The Christ in us regardless.
Praise be to God who doesn’t give up on us. Praise be to God who knows our sin and still declares love wins. Amen.
Emily Caroll
The Rev, Emily Carroll
The Rev. Emily Carroll is an ordained elder in the Alaska Conference of the United Methodist Church. She is a graduate of Candler School of Theology (Master of Divinity, 2018) and is currently serving at St. John UMC in Anchorage, Alaska. Emily has a deep passion for discipleship and justice work that encourage right relationship with God and one another. When she’s not working, you can probably find her outside enjoying God’s creation with her husband, Aidan, and their 1 year old baby, Elias.