Photo Courtesy of Saddleback Church
Matthew Warren
Matthew Warren
Less than a week ago, Matthew Warren, 27, the youngest son of popular evangelical pastor Rick Warren and his wife Kay, died of a self-inflicted gunshot wound after suffering lifelong mental illness. As severely as this grieves the Warren family, Matthew's death ought to challenge Christians to lament both its circumstances and its aftermath.
By all accounts, Matthew suffered from depression throughout his life. Described as a gentle, compassionate soul who nonetheless endured debilitating bouts of despair, he apparently came to the point that so many living with depression reach, where the only means they see to ending their pain is to end their lives.
This is not merely a medical citation on my part. Ironically like many writers, I too am a person living with clinical depression, an illness as real as diabetes, AIDS or heart disease. I have stood where Matthew stood and seriously contemplated taking my own life on more than one occasion. It is only through the tenacious love of my family and persistent therapy that I likely will be alive to celebrate my 60th birthday at the end of April. There have been days when it could have been my hand on a trigger or a bottle of pills; I pray God defend me and other sufferers from such days in the future.
Such personal experience endows all of us who endure chronic mental illness with compassion at Matthew's death. We mourn both for the Warren family's personal tragedy and for our church and society, both of which still view mental illness as a shameful character defect even after countless medical studies have tracked genuine physiological causes of such diseases. Indeed, one way to honor Matthew's life would be to advocate for more research into mental illness, for better treatment, and for less stigma.
Beyond my grief at a young life cut short by this terrible illness, I'm shocked and disturbed at the bad "triage theology" and blatant ill will that have infected public reaction since Pastor Warren bravely announced his son's death in an email asking for prayers. As defined by the Rev. Dr. Frederick W. Schmidt's superb book, What God Wants for Your Life, "triage theology" results when people trot out worthless platitudes instead of genuine compassion in the face of tragedy and death.
Triage theology says that Matthew's death was somehow God's will. Triage theology says stupid things like, "well, God needed another angel in heaven." Triage theology tries to ignore the reality that bad things can happen to good people who don't deserve misfortune. Triage theology denies the gospel truth that our loving God wants only good for us. Sadly, too many Christians practice such bad theology.
While the ignorance of triage theology might be excused, no one who claims the name of Christ ought to condone the chorus on Twitter, Facebook and other social media that has trumpeted Matthew's death as Rick Warren's justified comeuppance. Likewise, no one should condone any assertion that Matthew will burn in Hell for having taken his own life. How dare anyone presume to wish such heartbreak upon a family, or to think he or she knows the mind of God?
And shame upon the atheists who conflate religious faith with mental illness as the cause of Matthew's death! Rejecting the reality of God is one thing; compounding a family's pain by attacking its religious beliefs in the wake of a death is inexcusable.
Do not mistake my intent in this lamentation. Rick Warren and I do not occupy the same theological or ecclesiastical pew in any sense, so there is no churchly aggrandizement at work here. The Warrens and I share solely the tie that binds all Christians, namely the bond of baptism by which we all are adopted into God's family. Yet even if that were not so, we should not dare call ourselves followers of Jesus if we spout some of the terrible things published in the wake of Matthew Warren's suicide. It's almost as if Good Friday has returned, as people shout, "Crucify him!" once again.
There is no cause in Matthew Warren's death for anything other than tears, sympathy, and prayers – and perhaps some lessons in humility.
Saddleback Church has established The Matthew Warren Fund for mental health. Condolences for the Warren Family may also be posted on the same page of the church website.