A Parody Sprinkles Comic Relief into UMC Tensions

The Latest Steps Toward the UMC's Future

OK, Baby Boomers, we’re starting the first “UMC Future” update of September with a blast from the past. Thanks to Chris Weitzel for this gem from his Facebook post. We’ve provided a YouTube video of the original version for those who’ve forgotten the music.

Resolution

For the UMC with regards to John Lennon.

You say you want a resolution. Well, you know, we all want to change the world.

You tell me it’s the institution. Well, you know, we’ve all tried to change that world.

But now we’re talking dissolution, Or something where we’re split in two.

Don’t you know it’s gonna be all right. Faith says it will be all right.

You say you’ve got a real solution. Well, you know, we’ve seen many plans.

You ask me for my contribution. Well, you know, I’ve been doing what I can.

But if you go dealing in fear and hate, All I can tell you is, brother, that’s off my slate.

Don’t you know it’s gonna be all right. Faith says it will be all right.

You say let’s change the constitution. Well, you know, first we’ve got to change our hearts.

You tell me there’s a revolution. But, you know, it’s hard to tell the sides apart.

‘Cause if you go posting and calling heresy, You’re likely to get a time-out from me.

I know it’s gonna be all right. Christ isn’t dropping out of sight. All right. All right.

We are here … or maybe, there … or there

I think I first was introduced to Venn diagrams in eighth grade algebra; now I see they start teaching them in kindergarten. In any event, I tried to come up with an illustration of where we are now in terms of the various proposals for United Methodism’s future. The accompanying Venn diagram is what I devised.

I included the results of the Our Movement Forward gathering in May because that group has written out its guidelines for a new expression of United Methodism, even though it didn’t come up with a structural scheme. I didn’t include anything from the July consultation convened by Bishop John Yambasu of Sierra Leone because no formal statement resulted from that discussion.

When I look at this four-part diagram, I find myself wondering whether

  1. Any of the plans presented thus far has a chance of passing General Conference on its own; and
  2. Anyone is trying to draft a single structural proposal from these schemes that share so much in common.

Most of all, this diagram repeats the pattern of activity that I’ve seen so often over the past 31 years of reporting on The United Methodist Church: most leaders are attempting to use structure to address a spiritual problem. The problem stems from the competing visions of biblical and theological interpretation around human sexuality. It makes me think that one of my spiritual direction colleagues accurately described the root of the problem: if every United Methodist had had a spiritual companion to help them along their faith journey, we wouldn’t be in the mess we’re in now.

I think we’ve lost John Wesley’s greatest genius, namely the relationships of spiritual guidance that occurred in the class meeting. We have lots of "small group" substitutes, and some covenantal programs, but few of these seem to affect the denomination's most serious decision-making processes. My hope is that if class meetings are revived in a new United Methodism, everybody remembers that spiritual guidance should encourage and support, not shame and condemn.

New Reconciling church in Kenya

Ophelia Hu Kinney, communications director for Reconciling Ministries Network, posted this news on Facebook:

"On Sunday, September 1, 2019, FUMC Moheto in Kenya became the first African Reconciling Church!

"----- What that means in plain language is this -----

"While The United Methodist Church has taken a cruel turn for increased exclusion and punishment for LGBTQ folks and their allies, there are colonial institutions working to drive people of color - especially Africans - away from LGBTQ folks, profiting off the lie that people of color don't love LGBTQ folks and LGBTQ folks don't love people of color.

"Because of the way the chess pieces stand right now, there's a lot at stake for African United Methodist churches. For an African United Methodist church to take such a public stand against that lie is a really, really big deal. We have so much to celebrate, but this church will also need our support and encouragement. They can't do this alone.

"Says Rev. Kennedy Mwita Thomas: “I personally would not stand to see our church being a tool of oppression to the children of God. We have voted not to obey the Book of Discipline on matters that separate us but to observe the three simple rules: do no harm, do good, and stay in relationship with our God. I know as a church we have taken a step which may make some clergy in Moheto FUMC face charges and be discontinued, but I am prepared and I will not turn back.”

"If you and/or your church would like to send a note of encouragement to Moheto FUMC, please address it to: Moheto First United Methodist Church, BOX 382, Suna Migori, Kenya"

Cynthia B. Astle serves as Editor of United Methodist Insight, which she founded in 2011.